Things I love / Hate about my apartment


It’s the perfect size (in total)
It’s close enough to the city to have all of the cool city amenities, yet far enough away (3.5 blocks out of down town) to be quieter and calmer.
You can get to almost anything on foot and if you can’t, then there is a bus line right here that will take you anywhere else.
You can see the fireworks from my yard.
We can have pets.
The city is an art center.
We have an awesome balcony garden.
We have a huge bathroom.
We have a decent sized kitchen.
We have tons of cabinet space.
We have a big yard.
Our landlord is easy to talk to and very understanding.
We don’t have to pay utilities.
We have excellent neighbors. (mostly)
The neighborhood is nice.


No screens in 4 of the 7 windows.
The porch gets REALLY hot because it’s over a tar roof.
The yard isn’t fenced in, so the dogs need to be on their “chain” or we have to be with them to keep close eye on them.
No washer and dryer. We have to go to a laundry mat and that not only costs a lot of money, but also abuses the earth.
The bedroom is really small.
It also has a strange “box” sticking out from the wall that supports a heater vent. This “box” makes it very difficult to place furniture in the way we want.
The heating vents act as intercom speakers so we can hear:
Our neighbors having sex (And I am POSITIVE they can hear us)
Their horrid collection of Hanson, Back Street Boys, ‘N Sync, etc. CDs
Their arguments that consist of screaming, crying (usually him) and the throwing of what I have to assume are very large objects… or eachother.
His renditions of “The Sign” and other Ace of Base songs.
When he wacks it to Asian Lesbian Porn. How do I know this? Because apparently he can’t hear the TV over his own moaning, so he turns the TV up and I can hear both CRYSTAL CLEAR.
The video games played by the front neighbor.
The vents also serve as a great way to smell your neighbors, bringing into our home the lovely bouquets of:
Burnt toast and popcorn, several times a month.
David’s cologne that gags me nearly every morning. Why he puts it on so heavy is beyond me, plus, Stephanie is supposed to be VERY sensitive to strong smells.
The previous neighbor’s attempt at “indian food” that smelled of old, burning, stinky cheese and fish.
The even more previous neighbor’s garbage that she forgot to take out before her 30 day stint in rehab. Rotten meat isn’t too pleasant even after a week. Try 30 days.
The smoke alarms aren’t actually smoke alarms, they are heat detectors and are all placed within three to five feet of the oven, thus going off every time I cook.
Speaking of heat; We live in an old house that has been split into 3 units and the heat is controlled by the back neighbor. They don’t like to adjust the heat so that all three units are happy. Thus our apartment is either stiefeling or freezing.
Not enough windows and the ones I have are too small.
The outside wooden staircase that climbe to the 2nd floor is falling apart. One of my friends broke a step on his way down.
Not enough ooutside lighting. I mean we ARE close enough to the city for us to need adequite outside lighting.
The house across the street has band practice in the basement from 7pm until 2am on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. It’s loud enough to make the glass in our windows shake.


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Vomitus of the Brainus © Aimée Easton 2006 - 2011 All Rights Reserved Material contained on this site are under copyright, whether my own or someone else's. The material here is published strictly for personal use, and may not be copied to any other place without prior permission. I have borrowed or linked resources from elsewhere and I have given credit to the source from where I got material. Any form of copying or distribution, may face legal penalty.

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